This weekend finds me at a crossroads of sorts. The middle of the month is when I am the most financially unstable and that is getting a bit tiring. I am a salty bitch right now so you might just want to delete this email and wait for me to figure myself out later in the weekend. I will be spending the bulk of my free time working on a couple side hustle ideas but they all take time. The other thing I’ll be doing is looking into a weekend gig. Money is a motherfucker albeit a necessary one.
Speaking of money I really need to invest in some new clothes. I caught a glimpse of myself on a Zoom call earlier in the week and the shirt I wore was one of my favorites. I say WAS because I looked like a turtle borrowing a too big shell. Without trying I looked regoddamndiculous.
I also wore a suite two weeks ago and I looked like David Byrne from the Talking Heads. For those too young I’ll provide a visual reference to save you the Google. Also, fun fact: don’t search “big fucking suit guy” if you forget David Byrne’s name… you’ve been warned.
okay, not that bad but you get the general idea. If I ever got that thin it would look like I had some olde timey disease like Rickets. (I don’t really know what that is but the disease sounds old and funny. I should look that shit up at some point) Plus I would never wear a light suite like that. Seems a little plantationy to me. My weight has shifted in weird ways and I am more than half tempted to eat and drink my way back to “normal”. I’m not going to do that because in spite of my stubborn refusal to admit it to him, that the doctor might have been right because my knees do feel quite a bit better.
The rest of this clean eating lifestyle can fuck right off. Except for the part that has made me a cheap date. Just got back from having a couple drinks with friends and I am a bit in the bag. Three drinks used to be my warm up but right now it feels just about right. I could devour a burger and fries right now but the only thing I can safely navigate to is the Burger King a couple blocks away. Me and the King have always had a bumpy relationship but in my current condition masquerading as a delicate flower there is a real risk of me rendering some part of this apartment forever unclean if I went that route.
I should just go to bed now.