I had the work trip that began on Sunday morning which is always an off-putting start. That meeting went well from my perspective and I actually learned a lot that makes me feel good about the direction my company is heading. There will always be turds in the punchbowl but the party itself is pretty great. Much like any party there are just a few guests…
I was a little stunned when I got back to find out that my first serious girlfriend had died. We were not in touch and only had chance encounters over the years but it still had has me up in my feelings. Its weird, comes in waves, but it is bringing back a lot of good memories.
Speaking of a lot, a lot of firsts with her. First girl I introduced to my parents as “girlfriend.” First one to meet my extended family. First out loud I love you and a lot more. The relationship was a rollercoaster but that was mostly due to our age and my own lack of maturity.
I followed her to a college which is just as bad an idea as it sounds. No direction of your own? Follow your high school girlfriend to the University of Kansas. Bullshit everyone around you to mask this weak decision and make it seem like it was your own plan all along. Drive the eight hours and move in to your dorm rooms with the naive believe you would be together forever. Then proceed to cause each other nothing but trouble for an entire school year as you both attempt to find your own ways through life.
That summer she studied abroad and I transferred schools. We tried a couple times to fire things back up but it was gone. Years later she came and saw me at work just after my eldest was born. We went to lunch and she brought her brother along as a chaperone I think. It was a weird meal and we didn’t even really catch up because of a disconnected third party at the table. After that we would just have a couple chance encounters over the years and then a ten year gap of no contact.
The last time we messaged she was apologizing for the way things went back then and I let her know that we were dumb young people doing dumb young things. Even out of touch all this time there is a part of me that misses her.