Last nights post felt a little dark after I published it and rather than torture myself by rereading something I’ve already written I’ll just post an internal rebuttal right now. Things are not bleak and I am relatively happy here. I would love someone to share things with but that isn’t a necessity of life. I went out to dinner with a friend last night and life has and continues to deal her some real shit. Comparatively I need to shut the fuck up.
Also, there is something on the distant horizon that I’m very excited about but it is definitely a don’t count your chickens situation. Maybe even anxious about, nope, terrible word choice, excited was perfect. I hate being so vague but its necessary. Life is complex and my love life right now is an enigma.
I had a little to drink and when I got home I actually downloaded one of the dating apps. As soon as I began the process of signing up all of the awful from earlier experiences rushed to the front of my skull. I was undeterred and started making a complete smartass profile which made me laugh but others would have mistaken for douche-baggery.
It asked me about my favorite music and I answered: Zamfir, Master of the Pan Flute. Fitness level: basement. You get the drift. Bunch of beer me was cracking up but slight hangover me this morning didn’t find things so funny. I am glad I got distracted and never went live with that nonsense. Holy crap, I should see if I can get it back and take screenshots for this… I’ll just edit out the too embarrassing sex question stuff. *editors note; apparently when you go scorched earth on this particular app there is no getting it back and I don’t feel like drinking right now to recreate the magic.
I’m toying with the idea of forming some kind of group on one of the social medias to see if some local people would like to meet up at the bars once a week. Real informal, no expectations, just folks who want to get out of the house this winter.
I’ve always had a mild gift for organizing groups and once I get that done I could boil it down to a Minnesota crew. This needs more thought but whatever it turns into it has to be better than swiping filtered pictures from ten years ago.
Anyway, that’s it for this update. I am doing great. I just don’t have anyone at the moment who wants to hangout naked.