And first a word from our sponsor... Just kidding. This thing has never been sponsored and in fact I have never been sponsored as long as I've been writing save a brief run-in with Google that ended poorly but I have this thing I use for tiny investing called Stash. They gave me a link https://get.stash.com/thomasrtavw that basically means once you sign up and fund your account you get $20. Full disclosure, I do too. I started with $100 at the beginning of the year and I've allowed it to take $20 per pay period and it goes straight into my Coca-Cola Company stock purchase. (this makes me feel a little better about my addiction to their completely chemical Diet Coke) Do it or don't. I looked at my balance for the first time in a long time and was surprised. I shifted 40% of my sub $800 portfolio to the Rivian IPO this week because I think their truck is incredible. Anyway, enough about me entertaining myself with $40 a month. One final note: if you sign up don't ignore the stash party texts. They give away fractional shares of stock about once a week. It makes me laugh because I own $0.22 of Netflix and $0.19 of Disney. Never going to make me rich but makes me laugh when I look at my portfolio. Enough of this nonsense and back to the nonsense you normally stop by here for...
I had real life friends asking about my fall spot so I took that picture. I flew up the little landing thing and cleared the first two steps, then the next two, (recapping, I was taking the stairs two at a time whilst reading like an idiot) on the 6th tread I hit the spill and as I felt myself going into the splits my lizard brain and gravity took over. The book in my hands flew as I caught the rail and violently pulling out of the splits caused me to fall backwards but because I had ahold of the railing it was more side to frontwards. I hit some stairs as evident by the bruising but ended up on that landing square ass over teacup. (I probably shouldn't have used that last bit because I don't really understand what it means. Upon first read it is confusing and mildly disturbing. Oh well.)
The adrenaline and fear of discovery took over as I scrambled to my feet and finished the climb to my apartment. I smelled wonderfully like laundry soap but started to get a little sore. I'm not going to go through the entire ordeal of later that night but I attributed some of my bad feelings to my behated Chicago Bears on Monday Night Football.
The only other thing I wish for, other than a camera in that stairwell so I could find the spiller who walked away from the mess..., is an audio recording. It had to be hilarious. I know there was some type of primitive scream because that uncarpeted part of the stairwell is echo amplified and that loud was most likely abruptly interrupted as the wind attempted to exit my body at speed. Then the drawn out old man noises as I got back to my feet followed by dead silence as I listened for potential witnesses while I scrambled up to my floor. I don't remember what happened in detail but somehow the book made it back with me looking none the worse for wear.