one weird week

boring update, save your time and skip this one...

First, for any who were concerned for my longterm health from last weeks out-passing, I went just as hard as I did a week ago minus the running plus lots of liquids before my adventure and all is well. I still haven’t been back to that grocery store because I want the “incident” to be as far from their minds as possible when next I darken that doorstep. For now I will grab supplies while running other errands. It’s best for all concerned.

This week has been a mental marathon. As I prepare to leave a company I’ve loved for more than twelve years I find myself riding a rollercoaster of emotions. Hard to figure out what’s happening between the ups and downs paired with little movement toward finding my replacement. If they don’t act soon giving two months notice will have been wasted and I have to keep telling myself that it won’t be my worry once I’m gone.

I want this organization to succeed. People I love still work there and I am joining a member company. They have been great to me as well. Almost too great. I quit, but on Thursday they threw me a going away party. I reminded them that I am not retiring but heading to work somewhere else… but they insisted. I should also let you know that I am not a fan of celebrations in my honor. Never really enjoyed that kind of thing. I love throwing a party, attending a party, just not one where the focus is on me. Probably something to talk to a therapist about but I just broke up with my last one because she had her own agenda.

I was trying to work through the nest of snakes in my head around leaving this job and moving back to Illinois. She kept wanting to circle back to something I said the week before about not wanting a relationship in my life stronger than a friendship. I did qualify that it would hopefully be a friendship with lots-o-benefits but she wouldn’t let it go. So I let her know that would be the last time we would talk and after a couple weak attempts at saves she acquiesced.

I might be on a therapy timeout as well. I’m about to start a new gig and then once I settle in to that routine it will be time to begin my house hunt. Plus it could be time to talk to an in person professional once again. The iPad thing has been great and I avoid the crazy-waiting-room where everyone just looks at each other trying to figure out how screwed up the other is but after a couple misfires the on the line thing is beginning to annoy.

And speaking of annoy -ing I keep forgetting what time of year it is as I head out to do some normal shopping. Holy Hell I had to get some things at Target today and I couldn’t do my normal preorder because I actually needed to shop and I wanted someone dead about five minutes in. The sheer amount of slow moving humans was staggering, err, crawling. I had no idea that some people mope up and down isles looking at ALL the things. For Fuck Sake laundry detergent hasn’t undergone a major shift or innovation since the annoying pods were invented. Grab your brand and keep moving.

I need to go because I’m getting second-hand-hours-removed crabby all over again. I have got to get better at planning so my shit just gets delivered to my lazy ass.