I need to be more careful

First, an unsolicited surprise awaited me when I got back this week and it immediately made me smile.

My friend made me a middle finger filled with screws. Its perfect. Glitter and screws. Plus, it lights up! I realize I am a shit photographer and I probably could have edited the image better show the details but you my dear audience member get what you pay for. Anyway, it is glorious. Thanks Jane!

Last night I got to go to the dance recital for the youngest of my god children and it was awesome. Something surreal sitting next to my childhood best friend in the theater of the high school we attended watching his youngest child perform. Great and odd on a lot of levels but I do so love things like this. I did remind him that we used to go to those shows to watch the girls dance in what we then called leotards (don’t clothing name shame me, I didn’t know that tube tops weren’t officially called Boob Tubes until I was way into adulthood…) but those were different times.

During the entire performance I was all inside of my own skull. Stories were flooding in and I was nostalgic as a mutha effa. By the time I got home my brain was in overdrive so I self medicated with a loaded gummy and tried to chill out. One thing led to another and for some unknown reason I turned on an old online dating profile or two. For fuck sake I woke up to some notifications that gave me douche chills. I immediately deleted the apps and all that go along with them as a ghost from my past matched with me. I think I finally need to learn my lesson… touch fire, get burned.

I think I threw down a dating gauntlet with my roommate but I can’t remember what was on the line so I’m afraid to try and walk the agreement back lest I lose something I care about or worse am subject to an unremembered punishment. I really need to use more caution when I am already up in my feels. Then throw in some THC and a pinch of weekend loneliness and it’s a recipe for trouble. At least if I start dating again there will be stories. And the good news is I can start with the Facebook dating thing again as I had to shut that down due to a woman in Minnesota that got way too serious way too fast. (I think that run-on sentence was brought to you by the good people at Scared to Write It.)That’s a story for another day and I’ve told bits and pieces but she was an NSA level online stalker so I hesitate to give more details even now.

I need to get my shit together, have a great week.